We all know that the divorce process is difficult, even when you are 100% sure you are making the right decision for you and your family. Although each case is unique, below are few helpful pointers on how to make the divorce process less traumatic and often less expensive too.
- Stop worrying about what your ex has going on. If your ex-spouse has a new boyfriend, house, car, job or hobby (that they never did with you), it can be painful. The more you focus on what she has the worse you are going to feel. If you have children, try to focus on what they can gain from your ex’s new accomplishments and be happy that your ex is no longer your problem. Focus on your happiness and moving on with your life.
- Acknowledge that divorce takes two. Every spouse wants to blame the other for the marriage falling apart, but if you are truly honest with yourself, you may acknowledge a few things you could have done differently. Did you think you could “fix” your spouse or you chose to ignore the very thing that led to your divorce? Whatever it is, if you accept the part you played in your divorce, it can help you move on faster as well as avoid making the same mistake in the future.
- Forgive your ex and yourself. Of course, it is your prerogative to hold on to your anger and bitterness, but this typically leads to extremely high legal bills (and therapist bills as well). If you are out to punish the wrongdoer in the divorce, it is going to make the process longer, messier and more expensive. And, you might be surprised at the power you feel when you stop allowing somebody to make you feel miserable. Take charge, forgive and move on.
- Surround yourself with friends that tell you the truth. If you only surround yourself with people who support you no matter what, you are less likely to ever see the other side to your own arguments. It is healthy to have a friend that is willing to play “devil’s advocate” with you or to hold you accountable for your own part in your relationship woes. Sometimes we just need somebody to put it all in perspective for us.
We know divorce is terrible, but you should do everything in your power to not torture yourself or your ex-spouse unnecessarily. Whether your divorce is amicable or full of disputes, we are here to help. Contact the knowledgeable attorneys at the Men’s Divorce Law Firm. Our office is located in Orlando, Florida, but we proudly serve husbands and fathers across the State. The firm also serves men out of state with child custody interests in Florida.