If you are facing divorce and you have children, it is important that you and your spouse don’t destroy your family during the process. All divorces are difficult, but they don’t have to be full of acrimony. Below are a few tips for working with your spouse to put the kids first during the divorce process:
- The most important thing you and your spouse can agree upon is that neither of you will drag the children into the middle. This means no complaining to your kids about their other parent or blaming the other parent when things go wrong. This should be a non-negotiable agreement.
- Let the kids have their things wherever they are. It is common for spouses to fight over the things they bought being used or left at the other parent’s house, but you must remember the stuff is being used by your children – not your ex! Of course, if it is something special, it is okay to respectfully ask that it be returned.
- Try to agree on certain ground rules for your children. You will each have your way of parenting, but agreeing on some of the big issues and rules to be enforced helps your children have a sense of security and an understanding of what is expected from them with both parents.
- Don’t keep score with your ex-spouse. If you keep track of every time your ex is late so you retaliate by being late too, it can spin out of control. Everyone has faults and sometimes you have to be flexible and move on. This will prove to be important in the time you and your ex spend with your children. If she wants to take the kids to something special on a night you are supposed to have them but is willing to trade for one of her nights and it works for you, what not? Remember, your flexibility will benefit your children and they will take notice.
Even if you are the only parent that is acting reasonably, it is important to stick to the above tips. Taking the high road is not only good for you, but also for you children.
Whether your divorce is amicable or full of disputes, we are here to help. Contact the knowledgeable attorneys at the Men’s Divorce Law Firm. Our office is located in Orlando, Florida, but we proudly serve husbands and fathers across the State. The firm also serves men out of state with child custody interests in Florida.